Seventeen

He still reminds me of a time when I was seventeen

And every time I see him, I swear, I could still feel the braces in my mouth

 

And I know I should not be thinking about him, but I just cannot help it

Every time I see him I feel like all my insecurities are knocking on my back door,

I feel like my heart is fluttering and I don’t know what to say

Why did God have to give him such pretty eyes, and why

Is he so clumsy and self-confident in such a charming way?

 

1

 

His new girlfriend is a bitch

I have never met her but I somehow know that she is a bitch

I mean who wears flip-flops and sweat pants

Are you kidding me?

The other day she came up to me at this poetry show and told me that my poem is dope

Dope she said

Dope

Who says that?

What a bitch

 

2

 

I see him jogging up the street everyday

And I’m not sure if he sees me but I think he looks happier when he runs up my street than when he runs up other streets

Does this mean anything?

I’m not sure

I mean if he wants to get back together with me, what would I say?

The nerves of this guy, thinking he could dump me for that stone-hearted bitch and then decide out of nowhere to get back to me

I would laugh and laugh and refuse him

But what if he looks really sad?

What if he buys me flowers and chocolates and write me a nice card

He does that to you, you know

You think you’re mad at him and then he pulls off the sweetest thing and you can’t help but forgive him

I mean, I wouldn’t want to forgive him

It’s all God’s fault you know,

I mean why did He have to give him such gorgeous eyes?

 

3

 

I don’t know if I told you this

But he used to pat my head every night and I would fall asleep

I wonder if he does that with her

I wonder if he loves her the same way he loved me

Or rather, the way I thought he loved me

I’m not sure I would want to be with him if he loves her that way

But he is so charming though

I don’t know

Do I sound crazy?

 

4

 

He brings out the teenager in me

I hate him for that

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