Archive for hate


Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , on March 17, 2014 by themanwiththecowboyboots

He still reminds me of a time when I was seventeen

And every time I see him, I swear, I could still feel the braces in my mouth


And I know I should not be thinking about him, but I just cannot help it

Every time I see him I feel like all my insecurities are knocking on my back door,

I feel like my heart is fluttering and I don’t know what to say

Why did God have to give him such pretty eyes, and why

Is he so clumsy and self-confident in such a charming way?




His new girlfriend is a bitch

I have never met her but I somehow know that she is a bitch

I mean who wears flip-flops and sweat pants

Are you kidding me?

The other day she came up to me at this poetry show and told me that my poem is dope

Dope she said


Who says that?

What a bitch




I see him jogging up the street everyday

And I’m not sure if he sees me but I think he looks happier when he runs up my street than when he runs up other streets

Does this mean anything?

I’m not sure

I mean if he wants to get back together with me, what would I say?

The nerves of this guy, thinking he could dump me for that stone-hearted bitch and then decide out of nowhere to get back to me

I would laugh and laugh and refuse him

But what if he looks really sad?

What if he buys me flowers and chocolates and write me a nice card

He does that to you, you know

You think you’re mad at him and then he pulls off the sweetest thing and you can’t help but forgive him

I mean, I wouldn’t want to forgive him

It’s all God’s fault you know,

I mean why did He have to give him such gorgeous eyes?




I don’t know if I told you this

But he used to pat my head every night and I would fall asleep

I wonder if he does that with her

I wonder if he loves her the same way he loved me

Or rather, the way I thought he loved me

I’m not sure I would want to be with him if he loves her that way

But he is so charming though

I don’t know

Do I sound crazy?




He brings out the teenager in me

I hate him for that


Passive Aggressive Love Letter

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , on March 16, 2014 by themanwiththecowboyboots

So here I am writing you a love letter at 12 in the morning

And it would appear that we are revisiting themes that we’ve been over quite so many times

For sure, your eyes are blue and sparkly and sure, your voice is soothing and quite angelic

But I am tired of this nonsense,

Yes I am tired of this bullshit


You told me on the phone you wanted me to come over to your room,

You said that quite suggestively and I knew that something was up

And when I opened your door all you wanted to do was have sex

All you cared for was some passionate love affair that you had envisioned in your mind

Where I was the big broad shouldered male

The prom king who would carry you into tomorrow’s midnight dream

And you were his tall hot girlfriend

But you had never envisioned that there was perhaps much more than that to human nature

You had never thought that I did not want to have sex with you, that I

Even though I found you extremely attractive,

Just wanted to talk to you all night and get to know who you are


I am writing this to tell you that we were never friends

And yes, I know that we were never meant to be friends, but do not dare to tell me that friendship doesn’t matter

For when I look at you I see all of you

And so does everyone else

There is nothing to you except what is seen

And how am I to have you if you’re in everyone’s eyes?

How am I so special if what I see of you is what everyone else does?

How are you to be mine, if you are everyone else’s?

I am writing to tell you, that I am tired of this life, that I do not think that I love you, and that I ever loved you

I am writing to tell you that we are through
For even though this is a love letter, I am writing it in contempt,

Even though this is a love letter, you are not the object of my adoration


That is correct, there is another, and she is my friend

I tell you she is my friend, and I may never sleep with her, but I’d rather have her than you

And she doesn’t have blonde hair or sparkly blue eyes; she doesn’t have blue hair and sparkly blond eyes

She is just a regular girl; she is quite the nerdy girl, and she is my friend


For I am sick of hearing about bands and make up and shoes and boys

Not that they do not matter

I believe that they matter

Except I cannot be with a girl who does not like harry potter

And you might be attractive baby but you’ve got nothing else going for you

And she not might be that hot, but when I hear her talk I hear words and not pretty sounds


And let me remind you that this is not my fault

Let me remind you that even though I am leaving you, you will make someone else happy

Someone who loves sex and loves ignoring what you say

But I can’t put up appearances anymore

I am sorry baby but I am leaving you


Love (but not for you),


Exploring form

Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , , , , , , , on November 6, 2013 by themanwiththecowboyboots

I want to explore form:


Perhaps it’s seduction; perhaps it’s attraction; perhaps he’s pretty

And I’m just a virgin

I look upon him, with eyes of passion

He looks upon me; perhaps it’s attraction


Like a dusk only lacking a sunset he eyed me

And in his reflection, I could tell that

He loved me

He left me ten and seven, not a virgin

No virtue

I could tell him, I hate him, but somehow

That’s not true


He eyed me like a sunset

Only lacking a sunset

I could tell that,

In his manner,

That he loved me,

From the onset.

I could swear it,

I could breath it,

I could sigh it,

I could dream it.

I could write it- with my own blood

I could swear it

I could breath it.


Yet somehow

I know now

That he was


I could tell that

In his bloodshot


I could see that

He left me

No virtue

He left me

I know that


And Love

And passion

And more

And lust






Oh dear God



No longer

I’m no longer

He left me no virtue

In his eyes I could see that

He loved me, no more than

He loved his drinks and cigarettes

Like a dawn that breaks apart and shatters

All mornings seem dull now; He broke me I’m useless


Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , , on October 7, 2013 by themanwiththecowboyboots

Technically this isn’t a villanelle:

Some people cannot feel.
I have never loved her.
Sometimes it’s unreal.

Impassioned, filled with zeal,
I come close to her and whisper
That I have never loved her.

Disgust is very clear
On her face; it’s softer.
Sometimes it’s unreal.

It’s harder to conceal
On this day than ever
That I have never loved her.

Her freckled face is near,
Her warmness and her shiver.
Sometimes it’s unreal.

She sheds a lonesome tear,
And I almost whimper.
I have never loved her,
Sometimes that’s not real.



Posted in Uncategorized with tags , , , , , , , on September 2, 2013 by themanwiththecowboyboots

I have not posted in a while, but I have a very good reason. About a week ago I embarked on one of the most important journeys in my life. I packed my bag and went on a plane across the atlantic, an eighteen year old by himself going to the United States where he will attend college for the next 4 years. Arriving here and settling in has taken quite some time. But now I am back and as hungry for posting as ever. So here is a poem:

I want her to be there

On the day

Of my wedding; I really

Want her to be there

Maybe she would see

Despite it all

That I am happy

I want her

To see me happy

I want her

To be jealous

I want her

To despise me

Oh God, how I want her

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